Have you ever read something that's so powerful that you almost don't know where to begin when you read the last pages? Its been a long time since a book has given me that reaction. I think the last time was Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, actually. But I digress. On a friend's recommendation, I picked up How to Kill a Rockstar by Tiffanie DeBartolo a couple of weeks ago, being that the lead male's voice in the book was how Tiffanie hears Jimmy Gnecco's. (See, a Jimmy reference). It's such an engaging story, I could not put it down from the time that I opened it. It took me a bit longer then normal to read it (usually when I read something that's really good, I read fast and am done in 2 days) between being sick and Erin being here on vacation (and holy hell, there is a insect running across my living room floor as I'm typing this), but I finished it tonight. Some people said the ending was really out there and unrealistic. I didn't think so at all. I had tears in my eyes as I read the last pages, and I didn't want it to end.
It's touched a nerve with me. We've all been in Eliza's shoes at one point in our life - its very relateable. You love someone enough to let them go and hope that if the stars align, they'll come back to you, safe and sound. But the reality of it is that if you mess with fate, who knows what will happen. I am so emotionally involved with Eliza right now, I can't even begin to tell you. I felt every single thing that she was feeling, I cried with her and laughed with her. Other characters I wanted to smack upside the head and say "What the hell is WRONG with you?" There were parts where I felt that my heart had been ripped in two. I am trying so valiantly to put into words what I'm feeling right now because there's no way I'm going to sleep at the moment, even though it's 1 in the morning. I feel like I need a day or 2 to digest this and process everything that I'm feeling, but I just...can't. The book is an emotional roller coaster, and I'm so so so glad that I didn't peek ahead to the last pages - it would have totally ruined the effect for me. I think what made it so powerful was the writing and the way that the story was told. It could have very quickly gotten out of hand with the changing POV's, but it didn't. It flowed wonderfully and I was engrossed from the very first page. I felt like it combines a love story with music, and that's what makes it what it is.
I will admit that I read it because the author is affiliated with Bright Antenna, which is the Indie label that Jimmy Gnecco is signed to. Instead of Paul throughout the story, I heard Jimmy's voice. And most of you know how his music has touched me over the last year since I discovered Ours. I felt like this story, like the music, has touched me deep in my soul and left me wanting more. I feel alive and emotional, almost like I've just left a live Ours show. I read the acknowledgments at the end of the book and saw Jimmy's name on there. Knowing that he was an inspiration just....I don't even know. I can't describe what's going through my head and my heart right now. It gives me hope that one day I will love like that.
Bottom line? Read this book. Have tissues handy. And prepare to go on the roller coaster ride of your life.